How to Know If You Have an Addiction | Sorobey Psychology Centre
How to Know If You Have an Addiction: Listening Without Judgment
Many people who struggle with addiction don’t wake up one day knowing for certain that something is wrong. Instead, the question comes quietly: Is this still a habit… or has it become something more? If you’re searching for how to know if you have an addiction, you’re not alone — and you’re not broken for wondering.
Addiction doesn’t always look dramatic or obvious. Often, it develops slowly, intertwined with stress, trauma, emotional pain, or the need to cope. Questioning your relationship with a substance or behavior is not a sign of failure. It’s a sign of awareness.
This article isn’t about labels or diagnoses. It’s about helping you listen to what your experiences may be trying to tell you — with honesty and compassion.
Why This Question Is So Hard to Ask
One of the reasons it’s difficult to recognize addiction is because it often begins as relief. A drink that takes the edge off. A substance that numbs anxiety. A behavior that creates temporary escape or control. Over time, what once helped can quietly start to take more than it gives.
Many people avoid asking how to know if you have an addiction because of fear — fear of judgment, fear of losing something familiar, or fear of what change might require. But avoidance doesn’t mean there isn’t a problem. It often means something inside you is trying to protect itself.
What Addiction Really Is (Beyond the Stereotypes)
Addiction is not about weakness or lack of discipline. It’s about the nervous system learning to rely on something external to regulate emotions, stress, or pain. For many people, addiction is connected to trauma, chronic stress, unmet emotional needs, or feeling overwhelmed for a long time.
This is why two people can use the same substance or engage in the same behavior — and only one develops an addiction. Context matters. Emotional history matters. Your internal world matters.
What Your Nervous System Wants You to Notice
Instead of asking, “Am I bad for this?” a more helpful question is, “What role is this playing in my life?”
Here are some patterns that often signal it may be time to look more closely.
You use a substance or behavior to calm anxiety, numb emotions, escape stress, or cope with discomfort
You feel uneasy, irritable, or restless when you try to stop or cut back
What started as occasional use has become more frequent or harder to control
You think about it more than you want to admit
You’ve tried to change your behavior and found it harder than expected
You feel guilt, shame, or secrecy around your use
It’s beginning to affect relationships, work, health, or how you feel about yourself
Not all of these need to be present. Even one or two can be enough to pause and reflect. Understanding how to know if you have an addiction begins with noticing patterns — not judging them.
The Difference Between Habit and Addiction
Habits are behaviors you can usually adjust without intense emotional distress. Addiction, on the other hand, often feels necessary — like something you rely on to get through the day or manage internal discomfort.
If stopping feels emotionally threatening rather than inconvenient, that’s important information. Addiction is less about how often you use something and more about why you use it and what happens when you try not to.
Why Self-Blame Gets in the Way of Clarity
Many people stay stuck because they believe addiction means they’ve failed. But shame actually strengthens addictive cycles by increasing stress and emotional pain — the very things addiction tries to soothe.
If you’re asking how to know if you have an addiction, the goal isn’t to accuse yourself. It’s to understand yourself. Clarity creates options. Compassion creates movement.
When Curiosity Becomes the First Step Toward Healing
You don’t need to be “ready to quit forever” to explore this question. You don’t need a label. You don’t need to hit a breaking point. You only need curiosity and support.
Therapy offers a space to explore your relationship with substances or behaviors without judgment — to understand what they’ve been doing for you, what they may be costing you, and what other forms of support might be possible.
“Healing doesn’t begin with shame. It begins with understanding.”
— Mary Sorobey, Registered Psychologist
You Don’t Have to Figure This Out Alone
If you’re questioning how to know if you have an addiction, that question itself deserves care and attention. Whether you’re noticing early signs, feeling unsure, or already feeling stuck, support can help you move forward with clarity rather than fear.
Mary offers a safe, non-judgmental space to explore these concerns at your pace — with compassion, honesty, and evidence-based support.
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